Asking for What You Want
Lesson time 12:48 min
Emily offers strategies that make talking about sex easy and fun. From expressing desires and turn-ons to sharing feedback and fantasies, learn why honest communication is essential to a healthy sex life.
Students give MasterClass an average rating of 4.7 out of 5 stars
Topics include: Start the Conversation • The Three Ts for Healthy Communication • Create a Sexual Menu • Give Your Partner Feedback • Create a Sexual Bucket List • Sharing Fantasies
[00:00:00.30] - This class contains mature content. Viewer discretion is advised. [00:00:09.98] [MUSIC PLAYING] [00:00:17.24] - Having a healthy sex life is actually-- so much of it has to do with communication, not only if you're in a relationship. But how are you communicating to yourself about sex? Communication is a lubrication. The more that you communicate about sex in a healthy way, you're going to have healthier sex, better relationships. [00:00:38.06] So much of what I do is not necessarily that the techniques and the tips actually help-- I mean, a lot of it is that too. But it's helping people break through their barriers and their fears around communication. And-- and-- and the more that we are able to have a healthy dialogue, with a partner who is not gonna shame us, they're not gonna blame us, they're not gonna judge us, someone that we feel safe with, you know, the better sex we're going to have. [00:01:06.24] We're going to feel more free, more open. Think about it. Like why haven't you told your partner that you'd like them to go down on you more? Like why-- why haven't you asked for, you know, more-- what you need from your partner to turn you on? You-- you probably know. Like you-- you probably know what you need and you're not saying it. And so I'm gonna say, why? [00:01:28.19] And typically, it's because we are so afraid. We are-- we are so scared that if I talk to my partner about sex, if I tell my partner that I masturbate, if I tell my partner that, you know, this is what I need to think about to be turned on or I want you to spank me or, you know, all the things. [00:01:51.53] We are so afraid, since we've never talked about it, that they're gonna reject us, that they're going to abandon us, they're gonna judge us, they're gonna think we're a freak. And so as a result, I think we make these decisions. And they're not even conscious. We think, well, I'd much rather have a life of unsatisfying sex than risk talking to my partner about what I authentically, like, want and need in the bedroom. [00:02:19.86] [MUSIC PLAYING] [00:02:26.60] The first thing, if you've never talked about sex and it's really hard for you, and this is-- this is most people that I speak with, is that acknowledging that this is really hard and saying, you know what, I know we've been together for a long time, but talking about sex is really uncomfortable. [00:02:46.50] And I'm-- it makes me really anxious, or it makes me feel scared. But I know that it's important. And I'm not even sure what to say. But I have a feeling there's more here that we could learn to be better lovers to each other. We could learn so much more that we have an unlimited capacity for connection and pleasure. [00:03:08.86] And I realize that we've never talked about our sex life. And so I thought it'd be something that we should venture. Like let's bring that under our wing of things that we discuss. You know, the-- the movies we watch and the books w...
About the Instructor
The host of the long-running podcast Sex With Emily has made it her mission to normalize the conversation around sex and share her judgment-free approach to discovering a more pleasure-focused sex life. In her MasterClass, she helps you learn how to identify what you want, communicate your desires, and discover new sexual adventures. Pleasure is your birthright—it’s time to talk more about sex.
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In her MasterClass, Emily Morse empowers you to talk openly about sex and discover greater sexual satisfaction.Explore the Class